The run was good again, but my pace was a little slower as I felt a bit weighed down by the chicken Pad Thai and papaya salad I consumed the night before via room service (more on this later too). As I ran along, I saw a few things worth noting.
First, there's no shortage of four familiar chain establishments in town: 7/11, McDonald's, Subway, and Starbucks. 7/11 has by far the most locations, and in some cases there are two or three on one block. All in the name of convenience I suppose.. and some of them are small - like NYC studio-size small. Next in line is McDonald's, where there are also sometimes multiple locations of various sizes on one block. Really though? Is that necessary? I digress.
Second, YOU don't have the right of way here - everyone else does. This is a slight continuation from my previous note on the absence of traffic signals (and seemingly most law-related statutes in general). One might think that if someone
is jogging along the sidewalk, pedestrians would yield the right of way.. or at least move over two feet and let the runner pass by.. and one would be wrong. These people weren't even bracing for a collision - it reminded me of how I act whilst crossing a street in NYC when a cab is turning onto it - I disregard its existence and then continue on with my day, thinking "this cab won't hit me - he'll wait until I cross and then finish his turn." The thought is that my walking in front of his car will prevent him from continuing forward. This line of thinking isn't completely flawed as pedestrians do legally have the right of way.. except in my initial example, we're BOTH pedestrians. W T F?
You're walking leisurely, and I'm running. I have a pace, and if we collide, I'm far less likely to be hurt or get knocked down due to my momentum advantage. So why in the world wouldn't you move?!?! I'll tell you why - because you're lazy, and you ASSume that because I'm running, I'm at least slightly less lazy, and I'll yield to you. And you're right. If we did collide though.. whose fault would that even be? Unsurprisingly, I have an answer - it would be my fault. as I believe I decoded the unwritten rules of the road here (since there are clearly no written rules to speak of). Just as with a person and a car in NY, the person or vehicle of greater size and/or momentum must yield to the vehicle or person of lesser size or momentum. That's it! I realize that this may get dicey if you have a small person/vehicle moving with a lot of momentum and a larger vehicle/person moving with lesser momentum.. but give me a break here - I've been writing traffic laws for all of 30 seconds. So using this new law, I have greater momentum, so I yield to the lazy fng pedestrians who are barely paying attention. Fine.
A more egregious example of this traffic-related injustice is when you're jogging and trying to cross the street (remember, no signals so you have to be very aggressive).. and one of the eighty million motor bikes (I counted) riding around wants to turn in front of you. According to the new traffic law I just wrote up, a motor bike is bigger than a person, and thus they must yield to me. Right? Wrong. They try to dart out into the road right in front of you, very dangerously, preventing you from going anywhere. The streets are hard enough to cross no matter what you're doing.. walking, running, riding a bike, driving.. so it becomes a free-for-all. If you think you can make it, then GO! Move now and ask questions later.. or never. Just go. Maybe my new traffic law needs to be amended.. or just thrown out altogether.
During my run I also spotted a hotel with a really great name.. very indirect and vague.. called SleepWithMe Hotel. Nice.
Last night I noticed my fancy new Beats Pill looks SO legitimate.. but it must be a knockoff for the price I paid. That said, when you turn it on, it does make the disturbingly loud startup sound that can't be adjusted. This loud sequences of notes could wake an entire household out of a deep sleep without a problem.. and the sound quality could probably be better.. so maybe that's where the knockoff comes into play. But that begs the question - what ISN'T a knockoff here? Is the sweet little North Face backpack a knockoff? .. what about my Nike bathing suit? .. and the Mercedes Benz outside my hotel? Just where does this deception end?!!? Or.. is it at all possible that all this stuff is legit, but just really, really cheap? Who knows..
It's taken me some time to adjust to.. time. More specifically, from my first night in Korea, I've been falling asleep by 10-11 and waking up by 6. These are work-sleeping-hours.. but damnit, I'm on vacation. I haven't gone out beyond dinner for one night anywhere, and Bangla Road in Patong (where I'm staying) is supposed to be insane for a number of reasons. The previous night, I intended to go out.. except I passed out on the couch shortly after I began digesting that tasty Pad Thai. So tonight, I make a vow to stay up past 10pm and go out on the town.
During lazy beach day #2, a couple of middle-aged Australian bros strike up a conversation with me as we're all soaking up some rays (which I'm terrible at, btw - two full days on the beach and I'm barely tan.. maybe I should stop using SPF 30). They tell me some tall tales of debauchery between Sydney, Melbourne, and LA.. and give me some tips on how to navigate the madness that is Bangla Road. Now I'm excited.
Update: After the amazing meal at 76 Bar, I try to get a drink to bring up to my awesome and previously unused balcony. The bartender proceeds to tell me that they're not serving liquor on this night.. and it's not just them - no one in Thailand is serving liquor because of the election amidst the political crisis going on in the capital (where I am headed tomorrow). Well that sucks.. I guess I'll stroll out to Bangla Road completely sober.. right? Wrong. I make a comment jokingly.. "what are the bars on Bangla Road supposed to do if they can't serve alcohol?" The answer: Bangla Road is CLOSED. I'm in Phuket for two full nights and I won't even get to see the internationally renown Bangla Road. Oh well.. I probably would've just had my usual one or two drinks, struck up some boring conversation with a lady boy, and called it a night. That said.. down with the election and all the trouble it's causing! (this echoes the sentiments of the locals as well)
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