Bangkok arrival with mere minutes to spare + Meeting the tour group + A ping pong show: The ice breaker of all ice breakers

If you've read the post about my fun times heading back to Bangkok to join my tour, you'll recall that my departure time essentially got pushed back about 25 minutes. In fact, when I was purchasing these tickets online, I was deliberating between my original flight which departed at 1:55pm and the next flight which departed at 2:25, and I chose the earlier flight since I felt the later one was cutting it too close. Welp.. I was moved to the later one anyhow and I was about to find out just how close I could cut it. Luckily the tour group wasn't leaving Bangkok till the following day, so I was in no real danger of missing the tour at this point, but there is a lot that happens at the very beginning of a tour in terms of instructions and introductions that it'd be best not to miss for a number of reasons.

I pull into the gate at Bangkok's international airport, BKK, from my 2:25 departure around 3:45.. and I don't have to meet my tour until 6. So far, so good.

I remember Tapan telling me that BKK was massive, but until the next few moments, I didn't have much of an idea as to how huge this behemoth of an airport was. We proceeded to hop onto a shuttle bus to our arrival gate.. and 20!! minutes later, we get to the gate. Wow.. that was a long ride - almost makes you wonder if we could've pulled in a little closer with the plane.. but at this point, it's just past 4pm, and I'm still doing OK. That is, until it took 45!!! minutes for our bags to come out and for me to receive my checked bag.

I find the taxi line and now it's almost 5pm, and the tour meets at the Viengtai Hotel in Bangkok at 6. I ask the friendly taxi driver how long the ride will be, and he said 40-50 minutes. Great. Luckily, we mostly cruised and I got the street my hotel was on by 5:40.. the only problem was that the cab couldn't drive onto this street, so I had to walk the rest of the unknown distance to the hotel... that, and I had the option to go right or left on this street. I ask the cab driver where the Viengtai Hotel is - to the right or left, and he casually points to the right.. but I'm not really convinced with his response, so I ask again. He comes back with the same uninspiring response, and this time I question his honor - "are you sure it's not that way?" He then insists that the hotel is to the right, and not the left, but something still seems off about his reaction. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but I'm now less than 20 minutes from needing to meet my tour group, and I have a non-insignificant amount of luggage that needs to be ported to my destination. So I get out and reluctantly take his word for it, walking towards the right down the street. Hmm.

I walk for maybe 5 minutes lugging my bags along with me in the 85-degree Bangkok heat until I begin to get concerned with my timing and choice of direction on the street. I ask a few street vendors where the Viengtai Hotel is, but they're not having it. They're out there selling shirts with elephants on them and bizarre-looking street meat in this blistering heat - they don't give a sheeeeit where my hotel is. Finally, I spot a well dressed fellow who appears to be the host at a restaurant on the street, so I ask him where my hotel is. As is expected by now, he tells me that I have to go all the way back and cross the main road, and continue in the other direction on this street for a short while. But why, oh why.. was this fng cab driver so insistent that I walk the wrong direction? I tipped him 20% for the ride! Maybe some of the local folk just don't take too kindly to westerners.

So I press on, and arrive at my hotel with just a few moments to spare. At this point I've had enough stress and close calls for one day, and I still have yet to meet my new roommate or my tour group. Fingers crossed. Or, as an Aussie girl in my group would say.. fingies crossed. I'm going into this experience very open-minded.. I just don't want a crazy, annoying, or smelly roommate. So they bring me up to my room and I meet my new roomy, Mr. Liao. His first name isn't really Frank as I can see from the sheet the bellhop is holding, but he introduces himself as such regardless. Seems like a nice, normal guy. Frank the tank. Phew.

It turns out that he's 26 and used to work in private equity in Toronto before quitting recently to travel for a few months and hit the reset button.. so not only does he seem nice and normal, but we actually have a few things in common. FRANK. THE. TANK.

At this point it's 5:59, so we go down to meet the group. Of course, the group is not meeting where the concierge assured me they would be meeting, as the service workers in Bangkok are all pathological liars. So we find the room in which the group IS meeting and proceed to walk in.

My first impression was good one - it was about ten people aside from FTT (Frank the Tank) and myself, and we're the only guys so far. A few more people trickle in as we wait to get started, and the final tally is 18.. 6 guys and 12 girls (just like Geneseo) plus the tour group leader, who is also female, named Tamara. Also, as was the case with my Greece/Turkey tour, the group members are 75% Aussies.. which is actually fine since they're typically good folks and a lot of fun. Tamara, an Aussie, then tells us all about the tour, what we'll see, what to expect, etc. What a relief - she's very experienced at this (has done it for 2+ years and won awards as a tour leader), well-spoken, and seems very cool too.. and the rest of the group looks normal and cool as well.

Tamara tells us that for anyone interested, she'll be taking a group down the street for some dinner, and then she's arranged a tuk tuk (little open-air taxi, photo attached) to take interested folks to a ping pong show, a staple in these parts. More on that in a moment. With only 18 people plus the tour guide. At this point, my goal is to meet everyone and know all 18 names by tomorrow morning. And so we head to dinner.

There are a few restaurants on this street (Kombuttri Rd), and they all have a similar theme - huge menus with everything from local Thai fare to Lasagna to hot dogs and hamburgers. I get some glass noodles and pork satays, and the food was pretty good. I over-ordered, which was a good thing, since I used the extra satays to meet people at the table. There's one other American girl (Tiana) from Seattle, and we instantly make a vow to watch the Superbowl from Laos at 6:30am. Good start. There are two Swedes, three Canadians (including FTT), one South African, and the rest Aussies. Really cool group. Thank goodness. By the end of dinner, I'd met everyone save four or five people.

Onto the ping pong show. I'd heard about these types of shows before, and Tamara did give us a detailed warning, but nothing really prepares you for what you're about to see when walk in there. As a group of people who just met mere hours before, it's the best way to weed out the wet noodles and see who's going to be fun on the trip.. and also to see who can handle some of the most absurd things I've ever seen in person.

The bar is small and there's a stage in the middle. As we're walking in, there is a man and woman.. both nekked.. straight up having relations.. right on the stage. Strong start. As it would happen, that was the most normal thing we saw in the entire show. I can't repeat the rest of what I witnessed on here, but I'll be glad to tell tall tales of this evening in person.. just note that these tales will include ping pong balls, Christmas lights, and razor blades, among other items. Wow.

After the show, a few of us have another drink and some hookah outdoors at a restaurant on our street.. more good times, and we the head off to bed.

All in all, 'twas a fine day. I made my tour, and my roomy, the tour guide, and the whole group seems very cool. Now I'm relaxed and excited for our tour. Thank goodness.